A farmer came into town and asked the owner of a restaurant if he could use a million frog legs. Naturally, being rather shocked, he asked the farmer where he could get so many. The farmer replied, "There is a pond near my house that is full of frogs. They croak night and day and are about to drive me crazy." Finally, an agreement was made for the farmer to bring in several hundred frogs' legs in the following week. A week later, the farmer returned, looking rather sheepish, with only scrawny frogs. He told the proprietor, "I was mistaken. There were only these two frogs in the whole pond. But they sure were making a lot of noise." Often those who criticize us are fewer than it seems. In fact, it may just be a couple of old frogs who have nothing better to do that croak at someone anyway.

Introduction

One of our nation's most popular pastimes is criticism of political leaders. Especially in a campaign season like we're in now, it isn't hard to see that the higher the office pursued, the more severe the criticism.

During the Gulf War, President George Bush, Sr. was enjoying approval ratings in the media polls of 90% or better, due to his handling of the war. Within twelve months that rating had plummeted to around 37%, reportedly due to the economy. We are a fickle people when we can take our President from the penthouse to the outhouse in twelve months time!

The Civil War hero, General William F. Sherman, was one of the most sought after people for candidacy for President of the United States in the late 1860's. He was well aware of this tendency toward severe criticism of the highest office of the land. He once wrote, "If forced to choose between the penitentiary and the White House for four years, I would say the penitentiary, thank you." He later wrote to a friend who was trying to convince him to consider candidacy, "In a country like ours, the President is a mere executor of Laws made by others, over which he exercises a doubtful control. He must take things as he finds them, and cannot purify Congress or the Public Administration, though the world holds him responsible for both."

Probably every president has been vilified while in office at some point. Some of them are fairly sharp in dealing with it, too. George Will used to say of President Reagan: "He is the only person I know who can walk into a room, have the ceiling fall on him, and walk out without a fleck of plaster in his hair." Our current President seems no less adept, having survived impeachment with continued high popularity ratings.

Handling criticism isn't only the realm of presidents. All of us will be criticized from time to time and when it comes it can be a real test of our character. The way we deal with it is may determine whether it makes us better or just bitter.

Criticism is best handled by a predetermined attitude.

I like the way one forward thinking magazine put it on the inside cover of their publication: "Doctors' mistakes are buried, lawyers' mistakes are imprisoned, accountants' mistakes are fined, dentists' mistakes are pulled, pharmacists' mistakes get sick, plumbers' mistakes get stopped, electricians' mistakes are shocking, carpenters' mistakes are sawdust. But just in case you find any mistakes in this magazine, please remember they were put there for a purpose. We try to offer something for everyone. Some people are always looking for mistakes, and we don't want to disappoint them."

The Bible has some helpful teaching about handling criticism.

For instance, Proverbs 19:11 says, "A man's wisdom gives him patience; it is to his glory to overlook an offense." (NIV)

Proverbs 20:3 says, "It is to a man's honor to avoid strife, but every fool is quick to quarrel." (NIV)

Romans 12:17 says, "Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody." (NIV)

Luke 6:28 says, "...bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you." (NIV)

I Peter 2:19 says, "For it is commendable if a man bears up under the pain of unjust suffering because he is conscious of God." (NIV)

Do you thrive or dive under criticism? Most people come down when criticized like a plane hit by a surface-to-air missile.

I want to look at a story this morning that speaks of how one of the best-known men of the Bible handled unkind criticism and offense leveled at him at a time when perhaps no one would have blamed him for loosing his cool. Turn in your Bibles please, to 2 Samuel 16.

This passage describes that time in King David's life when he was fleeing from his own son, Absalom, who had pulled off a successful coup d'etat against his father's throne. Absalom's victory against David was due primarily to the discipline of God on David's life after his sin in the affair with Bathsheba. Because of that event, God had told him that although he was forgiven of the sin, the sword would not depart from his family. David was now fleeing the palace, just ahead of the approaching army of Absalom. Though he knew he had brought it upon himself, it was nonetheless one of the lowest points of his life. He was leaving all he had lived for behind – a dejected man, walking barefoot with his head covered in humiliation. Yet though he was miserable, he was not mutinous. He was in full submission to God's discipline. His words as he left the palace were, "Let Him [God] do to me as seems good to Him." (1)

That was when this man named Shimei suddenly burst on the scene and started throwing rocks. The worst kind of critic is the one who relishes the opportunity to kick you when you're down. Such a one is usually too much a coward to criticize you when you are strong. Those of his ilk often prey on people who are hurting. Like creatures who only come out at night, they wait until a dark part of your life to crawl from their seclusion and bite you. That is what Shimei did. Alexander Whyte was probably right when he called him, "A reptile of the royal house of Saul." See if you don't agree as we read.

(Read v. 5-8)

The substance of Shimei's shrill accusations were these: 1) He accused David of being responsible for the death of King Saul, 2) He accused him of usurping his predecessor's throne, and 3) He says that God had placed Absalom on the throne in his place. Every one of these accusations was false. David hadn't killed Saul. Saul committed suicide. In fact, David had spared Saul two times when he could have killed him! David hadn't usurped Saul's throne. God had booted Saul out and put David in his place. Absalom wasn't put on the throne by God. He was taking the throne himself after years of his own festering rebellion.

It is probably true that the hardest accusations to take are those which are not true. Somehow we don't mind the criticism nearly as much if it is true, but we surely can get agitated when someone accuses us falsely.

David had nearly lost his own life earlier because he refused to lift his hand against the Lord's anointed when Saul was on the throne. Now this "reptile of the royal house of Saul" named Shimei crawled out from under his rock and accused him of just the opposite. That, in conjunction to the fact that David wasn't in the midst of his brightest hour at the moment might have been enough to cause retaliation in a person of lesser character. In fact, there were several men in David's company that day who met the qualification of those of lesser character than David. One was the impulsive Abishai, one of the officers in David's army.

(Read v. 9)

Believe me, Abishai meant just what he said. He was the kind of man who was likely to say things like, "Don't get mad, get even!"

But that wasn't David's response.

(Read v. 10)

"Chill out, Abishai. Maybe it is God who told this man to curse me. Remember, I am under the discipline of God!"

(Read v. 11-14)

Could you or I have exercised the kind of restraint David used in this situation? Would we rather have listened to someone like Abishai? "Hey, you don't have to put up with this no-count, Shimei. If you don't want to take care of him, I would be more than happy to lift his head off his shoulders for you!"

If you are a person trying to live for God, remember that there will always be people around you who lack spiritual discernment who will advise you to take the carnal approach. "Get even," they'll tell you. "After all, God doesn't expect you to be a door mat. You have your rights. Nobody should have to put up with people like this!" You'll have people like Abishai around you. We all do.

Let's skip ahead in the story now to the place where David is returning to the palace after the danger was gone. Yes, Absalom's overthrow attempt failed. Please turn with me to 2 Samuel 19:16.

By chapter 19, Absalom's takeover of the throne is finished. He is dead, hanging from an oak tree by his long hair with three spears stuck through his heart, murdered against orders by David's General, Joab. David is being brought back to the Palace by the people. The remaining conspirators have either committed suicide or fled. David is about to cross the Jordan River on his way back to Jerusalem. Guess who comes down to meet him. Shimei!

(Read v. 16-23)

That is the restraint and confidence of a great leader. I especially like what he said in verse 22: "For do I not know that I am king over Israel today?" In other words, "I don't have to kill somebody to prove I'm king. I know who I am." David was confident that God had brought him back. Lesser men in their insecurity feel they have to get even with others who have wronged them or they won't be accepted. In fact, in those days, slaughtering all of the servants of the previous regime was customary. Not David. He was a gracious man because he served a gracious God.

So, how did David do it? How could he be so gracious when he had been so badly offended when he was down? I see four things in David's awareness that helped him and could help us, too, in a similar situation.

1. David Was Conscious of His Own Sin.

Had he spoken out against Shimei, it would have certainly been a case of "the pot calling the kettle black." Here he was under God's discipline as an adulterer. Was it right for him to take the position of judge over a man who was a reviler? Certainly that could not be justifiable in the sight of God.

Those who are the quickest to condemn the sins of others are usually the ones who either don't realize or don't remember the hideous nature of their own sins. As rebellious as Shimei was in this passage, it is neither greater nor worse than the sin of David and the sin of every person in this room, for that matter.

Besides, who among us today has not at some point criticized another human being with little concern for the truthfulness of the accusations. Ever criticized the President for something you thought was a dumb move? Read with me, please, the words of David's son, Solomon on this:

"Do not take seriously all words that are spoken, lest you hear your servant cursing you, for you also have realized that you likewise have many times cursed others." (2)

Before you and I get all bent out of shape for the seemingly harsh criticisms of others, we need to remember how many times we have done the same thing to someone else either under our breath, in gossip to someone else, or out loud and thought nothing of it.

Listen to Paul's words in Romans: "And do you suppose this, O man, when you pass judgement upon those who practice such things and do the same yourself, that you will escape the judgement of God?" (3)

It was David's intense awareness of his own sin and need for God's tolerance of him made him gracious with people like Shimei. It should be the same with us.

2. David Was Conscious of God's Merciful Nature.

Notice what David said in 16:12:

"Perhaps the Lord will look on my affliction and return good to me instead of his cursing this day."

David realized that mercy is a part of God's nature, that He delights to give mercy to those who submit to Him. He delights in extending mercy to those who, themselves, extend mercy.

Jesus put it this way in the Sermon on the Mount: "Blessed are the merciful, for they shall receive mercy."

When a former mayor of New York befriended a poor, dejected outcast of society, he was reproved by the prosecuting attorney who said, "That tramp's no good. He's getting only what he deserves." Hearing this, the judge interrupted the harsh counselor by asking with a smile, "Did you ever hear of the mother who visited Napoleon on behalf of her condemned son? The emperor told her the young man had committed the same offense twice, and justice demanded the death penalty. 'But Sire,' she pleaded, 'I don't ask for justice--only for mercy.' 'He doesn't deserve it,' said Napoleon. 'No, he doesn't,' she admitted, 'but it would not be mercy if he deserved it.' The man was granted a pardon.

Shimei deserved to lose his head for this, but David knew that mercy at his own expense would get to the heart of God more surely than human justice. David needed mercy, so he extended it to one who had wronged him and deserved justice.

3. David Was Conscious of God's Providence.

David knew that things don't just happen for no reason. God is there in everything at some point. The spiritual man will always be aware that there is more going on in incidents like this than meets the human eye. He knows of and gives credence to the unseen spiritual world behind the events.

Perhaps David considered that this was a test to see how he would react or to see whether his submission to discipline was real or just a surface thing. For sure, he saw Shimei as a part of God's plan in scourging him. He knew that God was in it somehow.

Jeremiah said something in his book of Lamentations that may shed some light on this: "Who is there who speaks and it comes to pass, unless the Lord has commanded it? Is it not from the mouth of the Most High that both good and ill go forth?" (4)The idea is that God is in all of it at some point - even when those of Shimei's stripe come with their criticism.

Whatever else it might have been, he knew there was more going on than just a man on a ridge cursing and throwing rocks.

The same is true when you or I are under harsh criticism today. A snake like Shimei slithers out from under a rock and starts doing his thing. There is more going on than meets the eye. God may be testing us to see how big we really are (or maybe to show us how small we really are.) Are we big enough to overlook the offenses of others? It may depend upon whether or not we recognize the hand of God in the matter.

4. David Was Conscious of the Greater Issues Involved.

What was at stake here was more than David's insulted pride. The future of the Kingdom of Israel was at stake. The dominant issue was not a lone man on a ridge shouting obscenities. It was a king being driven from his throne and a kingdom at risk. In verse 11, David says, "Behold, my son who came out from me seeks my life; how much more now this Benjamite?" The idea is something like this: "If things are so serious that my own son is cursing me, what is the big deal about this stranger cursing me?"

Those who focus on the greater issues of God's kingdom often find it easier to overlook the petty offenses of others for the sake of the greater cause.

For instance, a person might ignore a personal offense or just absorb it because their real goal is to win that person who offended them to Christ. To get sidetracked on the lesser issue would jeopardize the greater cause. In order to be able to do such a thing, you and I need to focus on the real issue of life. The real issue is not whether I manage to right every wrong done to me and dot the "i" and cross the "t" of justice. The real issue is whether I am bound for heaven and how many people I can take with me. If we can accomplish that, the offenses that come against us in the meantime are really very petty.

In another passage, when Nehemiah was supervising the project to rebuild the wall of Jerusalem after the captivity, he faced great opposition. His critics tried all kinds of things to stop him. They mocked the work, they ridiculed and criticized the project and the builders. Then they tried to get Nehemiah away from the project by side tracking him. They sent a message to him to meet them on the plains of Ono. But to that, Nehemiah said "Oh no!" Listen to his words:

"So I sent messengers to them, saying, 'I am doing a great work and I cannot come down. Why should the work stop while I leave it to come down to you?" (5)

If you and I are conscious of the real issues of the great work God has called us to do, then we will be much less likely to be lured down into the bickering and hard feelings that come when our critics take us to task. Maybe we could memorize Nehemiah's words: "Why should the work stop while I leave it to come down to you?"

The truth of the matter known, so often the issues that are thrown up against us are much smaller than our hurt pride makes them seem anyway.

A farmer came into town and asked the owner of a restaurant if he could use a million frog legs. Naturally, being rather shocked, he asked the farmer where he could get so many. The farmer replied, "There is a pond near my house that is full of frogs. They croak night and day and are about to drive me crazy." Finally, an agreement was made for the farmer to bring in several hundred frogs' legs in the following week. A week later, the farmer returned, looking rather sheepish, with only scrawny frogs. He told the proprietor, "I was mistaken. There were only these two frogs in the whole pond. But they sure were making a lot of noise."

Often those who criticize us are fewer than it seems. In fact, it may just be a couple of old frogs who have nothing better to do that croak at someone anyway.

How do you get big enough to overlook the criticisms and offenses of those old frogs like Shimei, here? Identify with the big cause of God. Nothing else in the world is worth getting sidetracked from that!

Conclusion

Let me wrap this up with the words of former President of the United States, Theodore Roosevelt:

"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbled or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena; whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, and comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; who does actually try to do the deed; who knows the great enthusiasm, the great devotion and spends himself in a worthy cause; who, at worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly. Far better is it to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs even though checkered by failure, than to rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy nor suffer much because they live in the gray twilight that knows neither victory nor defeat." (6)

May God give us the wisdom and the grace to be big enough to overlook the criticism and slights of those around us! May we be challenged to the greatest cause in the world: Living for Jesus Christ and bringing men and women to Him!

Footnotes: (Use your "back" button to return to your place)

Author's Note: This message was originally a part of the series, "David: The Shepherd King" which resides elsewhere on this website. It was reworked for a special need to be used as a "stand alone" message.

1. 2 Samuel 15:26
2. Ecclesiastes 7:21-22
3. Romans 2:3
4. Jeremiah 3:37-38
5. Nehemiah 6:3
6. Theodore Roosevelt, as quoted by Charles Swindoll in COME BEFORE WINTER.

Dave Redick is Minister of the Hwy 20 Church of Christ in Sweet Home, Oregon and Editor of The Preacher's Study. He may be reached at pstudysupport@comcast.net.

Copyright © 1996-2008 by The Preacher's Study. Permission is granted to subscribers to use this document in total or in sermon preparation in the context of the local congregation only. Publishing it in a book, on the Internet, or anyplace beyond the local congregation is prohibited.

All Scripture quotations and references are from the New American Standard Version unless otherwise stated.

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